03/10/2012
I don't want to sound self pitying or anything to that effect, but it's such a frustrating set of circumstances we're in. I know things are progressing & we're getting closer to the end of our first cycle (hopefully the only cycle) but it absolutely destroys me seeing Libby struggling with the injections & the side effects that come with them. She started off so well with it, & Considering she's never given herself an injection before, she was quite confident with it & seemed to take it all in her stride, but lately She seems to be getting herself worked up & nervous, making the whole thing into a drama. No matter how much I try to reassure her, it just seems to fall on deaf ears. Then once the drugs kick in, it seems to just knock her out. I know she feels worse than she's letting on because she's stopped baking & decorating cakes, that is one of the things she loves to do most.
I know where trying to do a good thing, & making a life that is our own is what we want so badly, But sometimes I just seem to want the woman I love back, Then I just feel terrible for having these selfish thoughts
04/10/2012
There's been a few times over the course of this process that I've thought the staff at the clinic seem to be looking down their noses at us, one person in particular that seems to think she's the lord god almighty. Everytime we've spoke to her with any concerns she's come across that she doesn't really want to be talking to us.
Today Libby has completely run out of one of the drugs she needs When she phoned up to speak to the nurse, who intern had to speak to the person I'm refering to & Lib' could tell by the tone of her voice in the background how she feels about us. I can't help but feeling it's because we're having funding for the treatment, this woman believes we shouldn't be in her clinic, we aren't able to pay for this therefore we are inferior. These kind of people make my blood boil!!! Hopefully, I've got the wrong end of the stick here, but I doubt it
05/10/2012
Once again Libby has an appointment at the clinic that i'm not there for. Yet another internal scan.
Thankfully the results are quite positive. The drugs seem to be doing there job.
Libby has 15 follicles in her good ovary, but they're not quite ready for the next drug (Another dose of Ovitrelle) So another scan is booked for Monday (Which, again i can't be there for) We're getting closer to finding out when egg collection will be. Exciting times
Hi Paul,
ReplyDeleteI found your blog via the IVF facebook page. We're in Scotland and just about to have our first IVF after three failed IUIs. I don't think you are being selfish at all. I can relate to your post and have found the drugs have really impacted on me emotionally and physically, so sometimes I want me back and I know my husband doesn't recognise me sometimes. It can feel like we're changing and I have to remind myself that the strain on our relationship is only temporary. I also love to bake and some days I just can't face doing anything, but sometimes I find that baking takes my mind off everything and I can forget what we're doing for a while. Both my husband and I are pretty wiped out with it all. It's been really great to read a man's point of view on it all and I look forward to reading more of your posts. Good luck to you both :-)
Hello Yvonne
DeleteThanks for getting in touch. It's good to hear other people's stories, whether it's good or bad, as long as you can take something positive from it.
It's certainly been THE most stressful experience or our life, & I never thought things could get so low whilst doing something so good, & a few times I had to question our intention. But perseverance is the key, & i'm so glad we survived. Hopefully we have a light at the end of the tunnel now, but if we have to go through it again, at least we'll be better prepared.
You've already had a endured a lot of stress upto now & by the sound of it you're surviving pretty well, so I think you'll do just fine.
Fingers crossed for you